Issued in Public Interest

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Date With Divinity!!

more later...too lazy to write :)

What's New!!

Been a long time since i posted!! well lets just say that i have finally upgraded to the laziest bastard on the planet, that being said a lot has changed in life..... yeah i am more confused than usual, weird questions keep running in my head, not just that ppl seem to think i am some worthless scumbag who is out there trying to be cool(like anyone else(no sam u dint psych me out, u just reassured that u r just a lame asshole who just got lammer) waise it aint the placement thing!!) , well true i dont really care but the funny thing is, from an other perspective, without knowing me, even i can come to that conclusion.
Jan was lost in making my CV, which i eventually managed to make it like any other guy did!! Feb & March were weird, with the first companies and all, managed to get placed (thats the only good thing in life, for now(the only reward of joining this stupid coll)). Well interviews are a fun thing to do, and mine have been very very eventful. Now i am 10 Interviews, 1 GD and 4 placements old, and finally after the hectic schedule of the placements, now am free and back to normal..

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Burning Heart!!

Can you ever love someone enough to let them go?? Can you ever leave the person your know aint the one for you, but it burns inside when she ain't there...Do you think you should hold on to her or let her go coz she is with someone else...What if you were never going to get her?? These are the questions a guy has to ideally answer once, but looking at the current trend of things "Love" has totally lost its meaning. the above questions have lost their sanctity, guys in 10th grade need a girlfriend for the heck of it, guys in grad school need a girl to be cool, guys in 20s need a girl to not feel left out, then there is the mother of all jokes 'the marriage', which is now a lie of sorts, its a way of saying "ok, i will close myself shut inside me, i will act all my life to be someone i am not". People these days don't connect, their girlfriends don't understand them, their definition of love is a disaster.
Love is more about the understanding and trust than it is about the gifts and dates, being on the phone with "your girl" for 4 hrs a day doesn't mean you love her, but meeting her after 4 months and not being required to open your mouth to tell her, to talk to her does. A friend once asked me "Do you think 2 ppl can understand each other so much as to not use words to talk", i said that is exactly what i believed love was. The purest level and form of understanding and trust. Ppl are lucky enough if they find one such person, with whom they can be themselves, whom they trust and understand, for whom the heart BURNS. There are always ppl in life with whom you know u wouldn't make a great pair mentally, who would only like and understand the outer you, but when you tell your mind that she aint the one, your heart burns, it aint a nice feeling....
Be it the high school crush, the really understanding friend or anyone else if you like her "let her go" if it was real she will come back...

But the thought that i would have to seal off the true me forever coz i dint find THE ONE is a very frightening though...

How diff am 'i' ??

To remark at someone is an easy job... to look at oneself is a tough one...
Well to make things clear, i never was & never am a guy everyone could be proud of. I am as imperfect as things could get, i am only human and a sloppy one at that too. If i were to be writing a blog post on me, believe me it would be long. One look at my blog would give an idea to you that i see myself to be above all the other mentioned characters... {well it aint true...not that i care that u think that way...} Well i merely write about things that bug me or my philosophies. Well this ain't a clarification post of sorts but is a post i am doing to clarify to u that i dont give a fuck about clarifying to u, If u understand me well u would know wat i mean... I have acted more and more like the ppl i scold in here, when i started a blog i was so psyched about the fact that i was going to "write" my thoughts...something i have avoided all my life, i went all guns blazing. It wasn't me to do wat i have done and as i realized the shell is breaking...i am becoming the man i pretend to be. I always had that weird respect for blogging...that and the apparent me mixing into one resulted in me doing weird stuff...ah well i am back in control now, and you wont see me 'selling' myself off.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Songs That Live In You

Everybody has a set of song/bands/Artists they call are their own. Everyone has their own genre, mine was Rap, and the meaning in a few songs...emotions...and thought hat go into its making... then i heard Metallica's Nothing Else Matters, i couldn't think straight after hearing that song, thats when i evolved from rap to Rock. And you always have songs that always hit you, songs which more to you because of the way we see that song, and how deep it touches us, well there are four song which i would die for

Led Zeppelin -- Stairway to Heaven
Staind -- Outside
Metallica -- Nothing Else Matters
Poets of The Fall -- Carnival of Rust

I can't imagine how people can be soo soo damn good, how can they even come up with such a master piece, since the first 3 r quite popular i wont put up the lyrics here, but the 4th song is a master piece heard it two days ago and can't get over it. Must have heard it a few hundred times and nothing like it, all the four songs are my most favorite songs.

Here watch it!! Watch

Lyrics: Carnival Of Rust

D' you breathe the name of your saviour in your hour of need,
And taste the blame if the flavor should remind you of greed?
Of implication, insinuation and ill will, 'til you cannot lie still,
In all this turmoil, before red cape and foil come closing in for a kill

Come feed the rain
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust

It's all a game, avoiding failure, when true colors will bleed
All in the name of misbehavior and the things we don't need
I lust for after no disaster can touch, touch us anymore
And more than ever, I hope to never fall, where enough is not the same it was before

Come feed the rain...
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust

Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the world is burning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the heart is yearning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the world is burning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the heart is yearning



Devil's Month

This summer was nice fun....first the trip to goa....then the night outs....its the best summer ever.

The Goa trip saw me doing things i never would have otherwise did. I drank Vodka(alcohol) for the first time, i was drunk on a beach for the first time, fagged for the first time. Though about fagging for the first time. Went on a trip with nil planing for the first time. Talked my heart open with my close buddies for the first time. Tried and got rejected to enter a Disc for the first time. Hookah-ed on a beach for the first time.Traveled 150kms to a place we had no idea of for the first time. Realized how alone we humans are for the first time.Actually dressed myself up for the first time. well there were a lot of firsts, loved the trip. Goa was magical.

The other month of summer saw me spending quite a bit of time roaming around, even at 2 am, which i prefer not to generally for my mom...she tends to get nervous. The night outs were fun, the discussions with my pals about anything and everything from politics to movies to science to art to life to space, was magical. The 3 am joy rides were an other story....basically was a wonderful summer.

PS: I don't drink or smoke anymore. It was fun for once and i plan to keep it that way.

Bro and swapna and deepakka READ the PS again. :)

Who am I?

Who am I?
I am not the same.....Who was I then.....I don't know.....I am changing....The cocoon is cracking....I have changed....I don't want to change....Leave me alone....I need the One, to add meaning to my life...But the cocoon is cracking....and I have no wings to be free....Truly Free!!!
Keep giving them what they want....You have to exist
Does it matter?
No!! But don't crack....You are strong....I am alone....

This is something that came from within, If u can understand that, You have understood me.........