ATTENTION!!!!

ATTENTION!!!!
Issued in Public Interest

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Burning Heart!!

Can you ever love someone enough to let them go?? Can you ever leave the person your know aint the one for you, but it burns inside when she ain't there...Do you think you should hold on to her or let her go coz she is with someone else...What if you were never going to get her?? These are the questions a guy has to ideally answer once, but looking at the current trend of things "Love" has totally lost its meaning. the above questions have lost their sanctity, guys in 10th grade need a girlfriend for the heck of it, guys in grad school need a girl to be cool, guys in 20s need a girl to not feel left out, then there is the mother of all jokes 'the marriage', which is now a lie of sorts, its a way of saying "ok, i will close myself shut inside me, i will act all my life to be someone i am not". People these days don't connect, their girlfriends don't understand them, their definition of love is a disaster.
Love is more about the understanding and trust than it is about the gifts and dates, being on the phone with "your girl" for 4 hrs a day doesn't mean you love her, but meeting her after 4 months and not being required to open your mouth to tell her, to talk to her does. A friend once asked me "Do you think 2 ppl can understand each other so much as to not use words to talk", i said that is exactly what i believed love was. The purest level and form of understanding and trust. Ppl are lucky enough if they find one such person, with whom they can be themselves, whom they trust and understand, for whom the heart BURNS. There are always ppl in life with whom you know u wouldn't make a great pair mentally, who would only like and understand the outer you, but when you tell your mind that she aint the one, your heart burns, it aint a nice feeling....
Be it the high school crush, the really understanding friend or anyone else if you like her "let her go" if it was real she will come back...

But the thought that i would have to seal off the true me forever coz i dint find THE ONE is a very frightening though...

How diff am 'i' ??

To remark at someone is an easy job... to look at oneself is a tough one...
Well to make things clear, i never was & never am a guy everyone could be proud of. I am as imperfect as things could get, i am only human and a sloppy one at that too. If i were to be writing a blog post on me, believe me it would be long. One look at my blog would give an idea to you that i see myself to be above all the other mentioned characters... {well it aint true...not that i care that u think that way...} Well i merely write about things that bug me or my philosophies. Well this ain't a clarification post of sorts but is a post i am doing to clarify to u that i dont give a fuck about clarifying to u, If u understand me well u would know wat i mean... I have acted more and more like the ppl i scold in here, when i started a blog i was so psyched about the fact that i was going to "write" my thoughts...something i have avoided all my life, i went all guns blazing. It wasn't me to do wat i have done and as i realized the shell is breaking...i am becoming the man i pretend to be. I always had that weird respect for blogging...that and the apparent me mixing into one resulted in me doing weird stuff...ah well i am back in control now, and you wont see me 'selling' myself off.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

Songs That Live In You

Everybody has a set of song/bands/Artists they call are their own. Everyone has their own genre, mine was Rap, and the meaning in a few songs...emotions...and thought hat go into its making... then i heard Metallica's Nothing Else Matters, i couldn't think straight after hearing that song, thats when i evolved from rap to Rock. And you always have songs that always hit you, songs which more to you because of the way we see that song, and how deep it touches us, well there are four song which i would die for

Led Zeppelin -- Stairway to Heaven
Staind -- Outside
Metallica -- Nothing Else Matters
Poets of The Fall -- Carnival of Rust

I can't imagine how people can be soo soo damn good, how can they even come up with such a master piece, since the first 3 r quite popular i wont put up the lyrics here, but the 4th song is a master piece heard it two days ago and can't get over it. Must have heard it a few hundred times and nothing like it, all the four songs are my most favorite songs.

Here watch it!! Watch

Lyrics: Carnival Of Rust

D' you breathe the name of your saviour in your hour of need,
And taste the blame if the flavor should remind you of greed?
Of implication, insinuation and ill will, 'til you cannot lie still,
In all this turmoil, before red cape and foil come closing in for a kill

Come feed the rain
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust

It's all a game, avoiding failure, when true colors will bleed
All in the name of misbehavior and the things we don't need
I lust for after no disaster can touch, touch us anymore
And more than ever, I hope to never fall, where enough is not the same it was before

Come feed the rain...
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause I'm thirsty for your love dancing underneath the skies of lust
Yeah, feed the rain
'cause without your love my life ain't nothing but this carnival of rust

Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the world is burning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the heart is yearning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the world is burning
Don't walk away, don't walk away, oh, when the heart is yearning

*----*

Amen!!

Devil's Month

This summer was nice fun....first the trip to goa....then the night outs....its the best summer ever.

The Goa trip saw me doing things i never would have otherwise did. I drank Vodka(alcohol) for the first time, i was drunk on a beach for the first time, fagged for the first time. Though about fagging for the first time. Went on a trip with nil planing for the first time. Talked my heart open with my close buddies for the first time. Tried and got rejected to enter a Disc for the first time. Hookah-ed on a beach for the first time.Traveled 150kms to a place we had no idea of for the first time. Realized how alone we humans are for the first time.Actually dressed myself up for the first time. well there were a lot of firsts, loved the trip. Goa was magical.

The other month of summer saw me spending quite a bit of time roaming around, even at 2 am, which i prefer not to generally for my mom...she tends to get nervous. The night outs were fun, the discussions with my pals about anything and everything from politics to movies to science to art to life to space, was magical. The 3 am joy rides were an other story....basically was a wonderful summer.



PS: I don't drink or smoke anymore. It was fun for once and i plan to keep it that way.

Bro and swapna and deepakka READ the PS again. :)

Who am I?

Who am I?
I am not the same.....Who was I then.....I don't know.....I am changing....The cocoon is cracking....I have changed....I don't want to change....Leave me alone....I need the One, to add meaning to my life...But the cocoon is cracking....and I have no wings to be free....Truly Free!!!
Keep giving them what they want....You have to exist
Does it matter?
No!! But don't crack....You are strong....I am alone....



This is something that came from within, If u can understand that, You have understood me.........

Friday, May 25, 2007

MYTH CALLED LIFE

Summer sucks

as i got to know first hand, i was coming back home(yeah thats the only good thing), and it was very very hot in the train....after a movie till 2am i managed to get sleep and woke up at 5am again, well i dint feel like sleeping and that was when i went into psycho mode....well all the ingredients where there, everyone sleeping, still dark and i was alone with nothing to do...kinda like now...as i sat near the window and started staring out and thinking about everything

i had a thought in my head, "does it really matter" my life that is, does it ever actually matter....i saw a few trucks on the road...now if i were to see life from one of the driver's eyes it would be interesting, he would have had a totally diff set of things to worry about, like food,water for this family...driving

now the train crossed a few houses...if i were to put myself in their shoes, i would be a guy of no concern....just someone, some random guy...after that i had crossed a few hundred houses.... these were ppl who had diff lives, parallel lifes...none of which actually matters to anyone else....and to think about it, I was just a guy from one of the windows in one of the many trains they saw...

such diff lifes such diff ppl, thus my question arises does it really matter...
life is definitely over rated....hence the myth continues......

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Brilliant Idiots

Took a long break from blogging for my project...worked 4 weeks ( ppl who know me plz read it as 2 weeks :P , it will make sense only then ) for my java project...which went smooth even during the vivas....so it was worth the effort...well was not busy just because of the 2 weeks of project work....but also coz i started an other group blog...

well when i was forcing sam (oh by the way happy bday bitch, u r one more year lammer) to join it, he asked why the other blog was for, i explained him as i am telling u ppl, that it was to shout out at the world, to remove all the frustration, that was when sam for once asked something sensible...he asked me wat i was doing on this one...well he was right in his own way but the new one is sarcasm at its best....i mean this(E.F.I.L) blog is very personal...this is me like being an open book...and otherwise (out in the open real world) most ppl wouldn't even understand the contents of my book...in this blog i dont use sarcasm to shout out at things...i just screw it from every corner in a way which i feel is justifiable to my principles....but in this new group blog, which me and the other sane ppl in our coll came together to make(yeah sam i am sure u r intrigued as to why u were invited, well ppl he aint so bad) we titled the blog "Brilliant Idiots"...well there was a quote i once saw "never underestimate the power of idiots when in majority"... yeah these ppl call us the idiots for not following the trend and not doing things the way society likes it...in short for not being a fool....hence we came up with Brilliant Idiots....here we shout out at the world of the idiots by the power of sarcasm.....if u have read this post up till here, i assume u would fall in the sane ppl list...well have a look u will have fun


www.brilliantidiots.blogspot.com
thats the site....do check it out and leave ur comments...

will be back in 2-3 weeks time with a more sensible post....ciao

Friday, April 13, 2007

Freedom.......is there any????

FREEDOM -- One of the most abused words other than say "culture" & "religion"....
They say great Gandhi struggled and got us that....well i have no particular fascination to idealise him but all things said and done, we finally got our FREEDOM....wat did we do next? we made all out efforts to confine ourselves to be "GOOD", i.e we put rules that ppl can only say certain things for the "welfare" of all.....

We cut the freedom of speech...the single most important thing other than food,shelter & water....why u say?? to preserve our culture and religious sentiments was the explanation give among many other such reasons....

That was then...lets see now, Arun nayar and liz hurley get married...everyone has a problem with it coz she wore a skirt.... and the wedding was not according to established norms......i mean wtf is that.....ppl get married coz it is an announcement to the world that they r together.....and ppl get married when they r in love....how they want to announce is upto them...not that i care about either of the too {although liz is HOT}
wat i meant to say is who the fuck is some self proclaimed religious head to say that i should do things this way....he actually put a case in the court....i mean how stupid can ppl get...look at this story

Once long time ago, there was a family... they owned a cat....well the cat used to always drink the milk...during the marriage of the girl in the family the cat drank a lot of milk, so the father put the cat in the basket and hanged it so that the cat would not escape...the children saw this, they dint know why their dad did so, but they just knew it.....later during other ceremonies also the same was done....the children saw that too....the cat died and they got another good cat.....after a few years the dad died, the children took a basket and put the good cat in it coz their dad did it, they though it brought good luck....after many years it became a tradition...anyone who doesnt follow it is either abusing the religion or dishonoring it....

I mean wat i want to do is my wish....its my fucking problem....so if i am an atheist then i am doing a crime by wearing only a short....or some other such crap....well this is the only thing i like us OF a for, freedom of speaeh....well never though i would say that...


an other such incident is about not being patriotic.....sachin tendulkar is accused of dishonoring the nation by cutting a cake which looked like the national flag.....Narayan murthy is said to be unpatriotic for playing the instrumental version of the national anthem even after he apologized for it just coz he might hurt feelings.....i mean all these bastards who do greater damage to the country by promoting corruption, disrupt development....those guys r the real ppl who r unpatriotic.....patriotism is a good thing but being sensible is another....raising the national flag or singing the national anthem is of no use....striving for a better India, and doing something for it is....well easier said than done but we can start by not accusing ppl such bullshit....


Finally we live in a world where the idiots rule.....and where sanity and sensibility are devoid of their true meaning...hope that ppl r allowed the freedom they deserve...





PS: Ppl with senseless religious beliefs & glamorized patriotic attachments are not allowed to read this post....or this blog for that matter...i dont have any place for u assoles in my little space on the web

Saturday, March 17, 2007

An ode to my roomie

well not exactly an ode but still....

well wanted to reply in ur blog only but though u deserved a blog post, after all u r my fav roomie..

well for ppl who know both u might read on, as u will understand it....and for ppl who dont know my roomie, here is the link to his blog www.aguything.blogspot.com


lol, nice way to put things kinda sums everything up....
i guess, may be i will bunk my rap (it was for fun, and now it aint any fun writing them anyways) and take pointers from and the self-proclaimed perfectionist i have as a roomie :P, i guess i am blessed.... anyways i guess its hard enough for u to be multi tasking very very weird relationships,projects, ur tough name that u always need to keep up to, and then reading some crap might have been tough....and yeah ayn rand would be happy to know that a guy (who btw hates books) has been with her novel for over 2 sems and still not leaving it, well i have enough earfuls from ur conversations with ur gfs/friends/i dono wat they r(no offence meant dude) to help me with my sleep...but i aint complaining


NA i aint being sarcastic and/or attacking u for the honour of having a blog entry dedicated to me, lol... LOVE U ROOMIE,and i am straight, well this is the way the general crowd responds i guess ;)
hope this will be taken in a positive way, and after all the things i wrote for myself i though ppl who read my blog can have something funny to read here...

Alone...in the crowded world

No one is alone, no one can ever be alone unless he misses himself...u always got u with u...well no this ain't some site which preaches self morale and crap, its rather the other way round, it has accounts of a guy (thats me) and his take on life and things he understands....well anyways enough of the good interesting type of blogging...this topic i am writing is wat i feel most of the times...well almost always...unless i am home, or in conversation with my good friends...


Well actually everyone is alone, well few realise it, most don't, for their own well being....i guess or just coz they feel happier that way...well the fact remains...everyone puts on stuff to be someone they r not, rather to show everyone wat they want everyone to see them as, well why do they try so hard, why is it that i have to put on a show to be called "normal"? why is it that ppl try so damn hard to show themselves as somebody they r not to ppl they really care nothing about? why cant i be myself and still be happy.....well this might be utter bullshit to most ppl, but for few its wat they have been trying to understand for years, or have understood over years....well either way the fact remains

everyone is "ALONE IN THE CROWDED WORLD"

Saturday, February 17, 2007

I Am Selfish

People say "don't be selfish"
People say "always help others"

But i don't give a fuck about what ppl say...all i care is what "I" say...i mean ppl will say anything when they have idiots who listen...who r "ppl"...its us, u, me...
why is it that it is always "Do u think everyone will like it?" "Do u think i look good?" or "But he said it was good to be that way" "but he told me not to do that"...everyone today do stuff coz they want others to think they r something...everyone is selfless...no one is selfish...no one even cares if it is good or bad...they don't make an effort to know if its good or bad...they do it coz "they said so"...all ppl want is to have fame, to be liked, to be admired, to be thought as someone...all ppl want is "to be seen as" but noone really cares about "being" that person....

This is nothing but selflessness...u r removing the self from the man...from his identity, the few who do manage to maintain it r said to be stupid, bad, outcasts...

well the title suggests that i have not been selfless...well its not totally true...i have done stuff ppl would have never imagined...but we learn from those mistakes, atleast thats wat "everyone says"... :)


PS:This has been inspired from "The Fountainhead", but its like this...these r like Newton's Laws...these r always true...no matter who finds it out they r still called "newton's laws", its just who said it first...everyone else has just copied...

Friday, February 16, 2007

A page from my diary....

Ppl i am 'officially' known as "D Dinesh Reddy" to the world....although only Dinesh would be nice, anyways this post is about a day in my life...well most ppl who make the effort of reading this r probably ppl i know, reading this coz i pest them a lot to do the same...but anyways...i am dinesh, did my schooling in PORPS,hyd...now doing my engg in JIIT,delhi {read noida}...and i stay in the coll hostel...


As usual my day starts at 12midnite, just came back from a friend's room, dint know wat to do...though i should study....make my parents proud...then heard "Nothing Else Matters" in the lobby...so shunted the idea of studies and started making a play list...added 5 hrs of music and 5 songs later i realised that it was already 12:30... started planning my next day in my head...planned to sleep now, wake up very early and study for my exam at 11:15...well that was the last of my exams{test 1}, just when i planned to sleep, arrow{very very weird, but very good friend of mine and fellow clanmate} came in and told me to join dota....after a bit of thinking about my future i decided that its fucked up anyways, so joined dota{its a warcraft 3 map{ppl who dont know wat w3 is, just neglect this line...its a game by the way}} after arrow promised that we r playing only one match...i got up at 4am after having played 3 matches and lost all hope on the exam the next day...the exam was OOPS(Object Oriented Programming)by the way that all i knew about that course, slept then and woke up in time and went for the exam...the exam is an other story...lol...took the question paper...read the first page of the paper and thought "ok the first page is not wat i am good at, lets see the 2nd page"...turned the page and blank...the first page was the whole question paper...well managed to scribble something in some very vague for of english...looked more like egyptian...these r some tricks of the trade...u can get marks later coz the thing u wrote was just bad presentation.. :)
anyways was back and just dozed off...woke up at 5pm... a friend calls me up to practice rap from a song by 'Papa Roach'-"Between Angels and Insects" for being the rapper in their band...after irritating my roomie with my rap for a few mins and an analysis of his face....thought of leaving the singing to eminem and becoming a ghost writer...took my pen started thinking... came up with this

I got a call, and was told to learn a song asap,
i was left wondering if it was a mishap,
i though that i could fucking rap,
but it just turns out to be whole lot of crap.

well after this rap/poem i lost all hope of the rap community calling me...well had to take my mind of all this...so was on rock mode...thanks to metallica, iron maiden, slipknot and system of a down made it safely back to being normal{some might still argue}...then it happened to ring to my mind that it was valentines day...got really excited...no not because of all the "love" in the air...but coz this is one of the few days in a year u get to see ppl being dumb & stupid i.e being themselves and even wear this crap proudly...after laughing about when to the mess, came back had a small chat with the more sane ppl in this world and then sat down to write all this...


kinda weird ain't it?? well that one of the more normal days in my life...

Friday, January 26, 2007

Rock On

You scored as Rocker, Mosher. Your A Rocker!

Rocker, Mosher

75%

Goth

70%

Prepy

70%

Chav, Townie, Rude Boy, Ned, Kev

60%

Trendy

60%

Skater

45%

Emo

10%

What Group Are You? Chav, Rocker, Skater, Emo, Goth, Trendy, Prepy Ect
created with QuizFarm.com

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

What u might find here.....

Religious bullshit, Astrology, Good decent language {as the general crowd perceive it, for all i care "fuck off" and bye mean the same to me...} and stuff which is socially accepted or is politically correct...these r things u will definitely NOT find on my blog, if u get offended by my views then fuck u...this blog is about my views and my take on things...if u still want to protest u can try, the farthest u r going to get is licking my ass...and for all those feminists "FUCK U ALL". come on ppl Astrology {its more like ass-trology, ppl telling about ur future seeing ur ass....u never know it might even happen...}, and why is fuck a bad word...or sex a indecent word...u all do it, or will do it {the hopeless lot who will never do it...god help u}...


O I accept all the terms and conditions, and wish to continue reading this blog
O I do not accept the terms and i want to continue living like a no good mfsob/girl


i am dinesh,but u can call me dinu,
i ain't an african bantu or a japenese ainu,
and u r definitely not the one i am in debt 2,
and what i am going to write here ain't taboo

blog is about my life, my sole,& this is what i value,
oh hell u can argue, but this is just the preview,
i dont give a damn about how u construe,
and for everyone who think i suck, all i say is "FUCK U"

My First Post.......


Well the first thing that comes to anyones mind is the name of the blog...well it is not an abbreviation, it is LIFE backwards....if u want to know why i have chosen so, u will know...just keep reading...ever met a guy who hated books, dint give a damn about literature and writing something without being forced to, was the last thing he would possibly do, well i am that guy...my inspiration comes from this comic strip... since i have taken calvin's word seriously i though lets start a blog...rather was encoraged to by my man sam {hey dude thanks for the comic strip)
and so for my fisrt post i am doing another first...i wrote my first poem...

the link i chose was "myth called life"....this poem is dedicated to sam and that link...

backdrop of this poem is my frustration to the many false characters one puts up to fit into the society


and the poem/rap goes like this


I am done with the false attitudes,
all their life, faking at any magnitude,
the same damn thing across all latitudes,
ppl living selfishly without any gratitude

U r living in a fucking shell,
does that even ring a bell,
or should i just jump in a well,
and meet u straight in hell

I am ashamed to live in a world where these kinda ppl r rife,
what the fuck, i fell like a screwed up lowlife,
all i feel like doing is cut my throat with a knife,
& end this precious thing they call L.I.F.E

well i was amazed that i came up with such trash....well sorry sam u deserve better...:D..well this will be the last time i write a poem i guess...ok people feel free to use the comment option...it is there for a reason...